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Wednesday, December 23, 2009

HOW ABOUT THAT ?


HOW ABOUT THAT ?

1. what kind of man was Boaz before he married? A Ruthless 1

2. I bought some Armageddon cheese today, and it said on the packet.

'Best before End'

3. The recruitment consultant asked me 'What do you think of voluntary work? I said 'I wouldn't do it if you paid me.'

4. i went to the doctor. I said to him 'I'm frightened of lapels.'

He said, 'You've got cholera.

5. This cowboy walks in to a German car showroom and he says 'Audi!'

6. This policeman came up to me with a pencil and a piece of very thin

paper. He said, 'I want you to trace someone for me

7. I went to the local video shop and I said, 'Can I rent Batman Forever?

He said, 'No, you'll have to bring it back tomorrow'

8. I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said. So I suggested the kitchen

9. secret to making a marriage last: I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back.

10. She has an electric blender,electric toasterThen she said,There are too many gadgets no place to sit down! "So I bought her an electric chair

11. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, have a little wine, some good food and companionship. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.

12. The last fight was my fault. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?

".... I said, "Dust

13. haven't spoken to my wife for 18 months. I don't like to interrupt her.

14. I went to the gym and I asked if they could teach me how to do the splits. He said, 'How flexible are you?' I said, 'I can't make Tuesdays or Thursdays.'

15. I was reading this book today, The History of Glue. I couldn't put it down.

16. secret to making a marriage last:. We always hold hands. If I let go, she shops.

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